I wish- a tragdic poem

I wish

I lifelessly sat by the wide window staring blankly into the nowhere

I swiftly watched as a curious predator soared freely in the sky free of any worries, sorrows,
anger, free of any love.

I thought of the ruthless past behind me, the deadly horrors awaiting me.

I closed my eyes as heavy tears violently ripped thru them.

I am free in this world yet I felt like a prisoner, trapped in a place harsher then a prison or torture chamber.

I wondered why my never ending life is so unbelievable, miserable.

I curiously wonder why I, was facing all these unexpected troubles.

I say is it because of the foolish decisions I made in life.

I think the greatest cause for all this treachery is by loving you.

I do believe readers if you do not understand my pain & though I know my thing about this unfair life my greatest advice is that it are better to die in pain than to love & live.